I fear that I will fail.
I fear that I will be alone.
I fear that I will lose the people I care about most.
I just fear.
Fear is the thing that drives us to do better. We can either be held back by fear or we can be pushed forward by it. Fear is a force that shouldn't be played with. It is dangerous and uncaring. We, as humans, thrive off of fear. We need it to survive. There is no such thing as "fearless." I nkow that I have many fears. I can be very paranoid. But I wouldn't be who I am without them and I don't let them run my life. Ad without fear there is no success or dive or need or want or epic failures. Without fear there is nothing.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
The Running Emotions
Once again, I'm sorry for not writing in a long time. Time has been scarce lately. It has gone by so fast, I feel like I'm losing part of my life. Anyways, on to my blog.
Lately, my stomach has been filled with butterflies and it has been doing gymnastics. Of course it's only when I see a certain boy or talk to another certain boy. It's rather annoying. I don't want to feel like I'm going to hurl every time I see a boy that I have feelings for or every time I just talk to a boy (over the phone) that I have feelings for. It is not fun.
Another thing is that I am the champion of bottling up emotions and tucking them away in a corner of my mind until one day I just blow a gasket. If somebody makes me mad, I don't tell them. If somebody upsets me, I try to not show it. Lately it has been getting harder for some reason. It's getting harder to shove my emotions aside and be a statuesque Leanna. It isn't easy at all. The only thing that is keeping me from going completely insane is Jason Mraz and writing. Honest to God. No joke. Maybe it isn't only Jason Mraz, but good music in general. But he is still the number one best artist on my list.
Stress is also ranked high on my list of emotions to eventually deal with. I haven't officially dealt with having a job, having hard classes in school, looking at colleges, preparing for the ACT, and having time for family and friends. I'm not good at multitasking. It brings out the worst in me.
But no matter what, I'll live because tomorrow is a new day. Tomorrow is a new me. Tomorrow is the start of the rest of my life. So I don't have time to sit back and stress over the little things.
-Leanna
Lately, my stomach has been filled with butterflies and it has been doing gymnastics. Of course it's only when I see a certain boy or talk to another certain boy. It's rather annoying. I don't want to feel like I'm going to hurl every time I see a boy that I have feelings for or every time I just talk to a boy (over the phone) that I have feelings for. It is not fun.
Another thing is that I am the champion of bottling up emotions and tucking them away in a corner of my mind until one day I just blow a gasket. If somebody makes me mad, I don't tell them. If somebody upsets me, I try to not show it. Lately it has been getting harder for some reason. It's getting harder to shove my emotions aside and be a statuesque Leanna. It isn't easy at all. The only thing that is keeping me from going completely insane is Jason Mraz and writing. Honest to God. No joke. Maybe it isn't only Jason Mraz, but good music in general. But he is still the number one best artist on my list.
Stress is also ranked high on my list of emotions to eventually deal with. I haven't officially dealt with having a job, having hard classes in school, looking at colleges, preparing for the ACT, and having time for family and friends. I'm not good at multitasking. It brings out the worst in me.
But no matter what, I'll live because tomorrow is a new day. Tomorrow is a new me. Tomorrow is the start of the rest of my life. So I don't have time to sit back and stress over the little things.
-Leanna
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